This was one of our most used phrases during my university arc(not the best period of life for me). Oh, and by us, I was referring to me and my mates. We had picked up on this during a neighbour’s over wild, overzealous sex romp. I vividly remember the moment: soft moans in the air, followed by a sharp loud strike against skin (I am assuming it’s palm on bum). Up next?  You guessed it, them iconic words: HOLD THE BURGLARY!!! Then came loud thuds of waist against groin; or is it groin against waist? I don’t know, you get my meaning I hope. This went on for not so long, followed by something that sounds like groaning and then utter peace and quietness came back into the hostel. Hold the burglary, lol. So I Just described my neighbor’s sex romp in uni, what does that matter?

 Well, you know I’m always seeking out ways to eek out meaning, even from the most mundane of things. My Neighbour being such a gentle man knew his companion required support for the strokes he was about to unleash on her, so he suggested she held on to the burglary; kinda like a Jack and Rose moment on The Titanic where Jack offered her a board so she could be out of the water. Well, not exactly, but you get my meaning, lol. What I am saying is in terms of pressure we all require support, when life had bent me over recently I had to “hold the burglary”  my burglary was my job and friends. Thankfully, I am out of that phase, and really it’s not the best of times for the human Race across board; economies across the earth aren’t having the best of times, there are wars, food shortages, global warming, human right abuse and in all these, we need to find our burglary and cling to it as a people till these constant thuds from life ease up. Hopefully, like my selfless neighbour we get “orgasms” along the way.

So, hold the burglary… Joy is cumming… lol, there certainly is a lot of joy in Cumming.

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